I began to watch the movie “The Holiday” around 3 am, and of course, I fell asleep. The interesting part is the dream I had. A monk was sitting in silence with me. The setting was a small bedroom type of setting. He began to whisper things to me that I could not understand verbally. Strangely, I did understand everything he said in both my conscious and subconscious mind. He held a scroll in his hand that he was reading from. He tried to show me something, but the “item” disappeared before I could see it. Suddenly, we had left the room and were walking through many rooms; some had monks sitting beside us ordinary everyday people. We stopped and chatted with a few of them, and the monk finished each visit by letting everyone know I was a student getting ready to graduate, but I was choosing not to be ready.
He shared out loud that “she doesn’t believe she can be ready; therefore, she won’t ever be ready.” We then abruptly jumped into a kitchen setting, and he finally spoke to me with words I could understand. At one point, we both laid down on a bed to take a restful nap. I was reading things in my sleep, but I don’t remember any of them. We both woke and went to a higher level in the building and out onto a roof paved with gorgeous stone steps. We smudged, cleansed ourselves, and he pulled out a scroll. He tried hard to help me understand and release my fears but could not do it. He wrapped a robe around me and told the group I would be ready soon, but I must continue to walk the path of understanding a bit longer. The monk vanished into thin air, leaving me on the roof alone to watch the sky and wonder why I wouldn’t try.
The theme of the “The Holiday” movie I had been watched was about finding self in order to live authentically. I sometimes wonder why I don’t try to live that way. Maybe I’m lazy? Maybe I’m crazy?
Sadly, it’s because I still live under someone else’s thumb. Do you?