Silencing the Bully Brain – Part III

Welcome to the last day of learning about the Bully Brain!

To silence the bully brain, first, you must consciously realize the bully brain is not you. It is simply our conditioned chattering mind that is filled with inaccurate stories. Negative thoughts come from a fear-based mind, not from the conscious self.

Step 1: Identify it, observe it, speak to it.

At some point, all of us have thought: “I’m not good enough to do “X Y Z.” When you hear your mind say something negative like that, acknowledge it!  Speak aloud and say,” There you are. Thanks for sharing.”  You didn’t ignore or neglect the bully. What you did is not allow the bully brain to take over – you interrupted its focus by talking to it.

Step 2 – Treat it like a friend needing reassurance

Again, speaking out loud, say, “I understand you have concerns and are worried. We will get through this. Relax and give me a chance to finish this.” Repeatedly say that each time it chatters. Keep interrupting its focus. Practice these steps for at least one week.

The “bully brain” will eventually need to be challenged more permanently. When you have mastered steps one and two, it is time to move beyond the bully brain addiction by no longer saying positive things to it. This final step is about practicing how to be in the present where there is no mind chatter.

In steps one and two, you used short neutral phrases initially and then longer phrases to entertain the bully’s brain so it would stop talking. If the bully brain takes control, it activates a part of itself that is hell-bent on making sure you always feel dissatisfied, exhausted, confused, and angry. Don’t let that start up again.

In this final bull-brain busting exercise, you must patiently practice staying present by grounding yourself at the moment that is, not the moment that isn’t. Moments do not have a past or future. There is only “now.” As you learn to stay present, remember to take slow deep breaths to anchor your connection to Mother Earth within the present moment. Breathing only occurs in the present moment. Staying present can be the most difficult thing you master. With patience and practice, you’ll put a muzzle on the bully’s-brain’s mouth.

I hope all this helped you tame the bully brain!!

Dr. Deb

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